That Face

I had a great weekend. I got to assume the role of stealth leader on our Middle School Winter Trip. My friend, Newt, (who not three years ago was senior in our high school program) took over the hands-on leading responsibilities for our middle school stuff back in August. This was his first trip and not wanting to throw him completely to the wolves, I went along for the ride. It was great to see Newt and the other leaders loving kids, playing foozball and soccer in the snow. It was great to hear about the conversations they had during cabin times with the kids.

The speaker for the weekend was a woman named Margo. Her theme for the weekend was the face that satisfies. She did a great job relaying the story of Jesus to 300 or so middle schoolers in a way that they could understand without making them feel like she was talking down to them.

I even left early to get home for a brunch Crossroads was hosting for the members of Grace Episcopal Church, the congregation, with whom, we now share a building. Grace is an established church and has been around for years. The point of the brunch was to say thank you for opening your doors to us and let's get to know each other a little bit. I sat next to a woman who has been singing in the choir at Grace for 65 years.

So I got to thinking about the faces I saw this weekend and how they each, in their own way, reflect the Face that satisfies. I saw the face a scared middle schooler who had gotten separated from his group at lunchtime and wasn't really sure what to do or where to go. I saw the face of another middle schooler who was pissed off at the world and didn't care who knew it. I saw the faces of 4 volunteer leaders who were completely sleep deprived. I saw the face of an 80 year old woman who wasn't really sure to make of all these young people playing their rock 'n' roll music in her church.

God spoke: "Let us make human beings in our image, make them reflecting our nature So they can be responsible for the fish in the sea, the birds in the air, the cattle, And, yes, Earth itself, and every animal that moves on the face of Earth." God created human beings; he created them godlike, Reflecting God's nature. He created them male and female.

Genesis 1:26-27, THE MESSAGE

Missing the point

I have been hanging out with a new high school friend, we'll just call him "Bob."
This past week, I had a vanful of kids to take home, we dropped off everyone else and continued on to Bob's house. Over the course of the next 15 minutes "Bob" proceeded to tell me a little bit more about himself, in his own, words, "sometimes I act up, I get hyper and jump around." In more clinical terms, my guess is he has some undiagnosed ADHD and impulsivity stuff going on. He also told me how poorly he had been treated in previous youth group settings. The implication was that his behavior was not bad enough to require disciplinary actions but inappropriate enough to make him stand out.
I assumed he meant the poor treatment was from the the other kids. But as I listened, I realized it was his previous leaders who were making him feel left-out, unwanted and not worthy. Things like this: In a room of twenty people, teams of eight were being made, "Bob" didn't get put on a team. Everyone has to be odd man out sometimes, but listening to "Bob," this was a regular occurrence. On another occasion, volunteers were requested to share their musical talents. Despite "Bob's" volunteering he was once again overlooked. Time and again "Bob" was made to feel like he wasn't good enough or didn't fit the right mold. I don't know the programs or youth leaders he referred to but I am embarassed and ashamed for them.
Maybe I am overly senstive to stuff like this because I have had to watch my own child struggle socially but this stuff should not happen. A kid like "Bob" might need more coaching or guidance or redirection than your average kid but that doesn't make it okay to dismiss him or make him feel like a second class citizen. As leaders, no never mind as leaders, as eveyday people, trying to follow Christ, our goal should be to erase the margins to which people like "Bob" get relegated not push them furhter away. Jesus spent his public ministry going to the people who got overlooked and left out and drew them in. The woman at the well, Zaccheaus the tax collector, the woman caught in adultery, the demoniac, the hemorrhaging woman, lepers, invalids, the aged, the sick, children,they didn't fit the mold and Jesus went to them. We should do likewise. To do otherwise is definitely missing the point.


tags Youth Ministry

Work in Progress

Hey...look at me...I'm posting again. Pretty cool huh?

I thought I'd write about something we are currently wrestling(in the productive sense of the word) with in our Student Ministries. I tried to keep the mission for our Student ministries simple:

Love (all students, period.)

Lead ( students into relationship with Christ)

Build (those students who choose to follow Christ into disciples)

Love, Lead, Build.

There has been an unwritten, but very often spoken, companion to those three: We want our students who spend any significant amount of time with us to own their faith. That means we want students to respond to the work of Christ in their lives because they choose to, not because I say so. We want our students to be able to articulate what they believe not what their folks believe. We want our students to connect with God 24/7 not just on Sunday mornings.

Recently, I feel like we have discovered another component that we need to work on. We want our students to know or at a bare minimum, begin to understand, who it is that God uniquely created them each to be. I think simply stating that fact out loud will allow many of our students to breathe a sigh of relief. 1) It's not only okay but normal to not really know who you are as a middle school or high school student 2) Someone wants to help them on that journey of discovery.

So what is it that makes us, well us? Not who we are, but who we were meant to be? (The differences between those two things is huge, incredibly important and a integral piece of this particular puzzle) How do we discover that? What conversations should we be having with our students? What experiences should we be creating? In what ways might we have to change what we do on a weekly basis?

Maybe there will be more to come on this as we work through it. Until then, I'd love to hear what ya'll think.


tags Student ministry Youth ministry Youth work Leadership

'til I'm old and grey

I started doing Student Ministry as a Young life volunteer. I had a "real" job ( I sold toilet paper and lots of it...don't laugh everybody needs it right?) and lived a normal life. I never would have guessed that 14 years later I would still be hanging out with middle school and high school kids and doing it professionally. Over the course of that time there were phases when I would look ahead and think I'm gonna do this 'til Johnny graduates. Then Johnny graduated and I said I think I can do this until Suzy and Joey graduate. Most recently, I said I think once Russ, Zak and Steve graduate I'm done. That would be June '08.

This past Wednesday, I drove a car full of freshmen guys from our weekly meeting over to the local fast food joint. Football players, skaters, honors-class kids and gamers; great homes, broken homes, dysfunctional homes; leaders, followers, and rebels, all who have allowed me into their amazing, wacky messed-up lives. We laughed and joked the whole drive. We piled out of mini-van and I watched the six of them walk into the restaurant.

I smiled and thought to myself I gonna do this 'til I'm old and grey.

tags student ministry youth ministry